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This Essay Breaks the Law

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By MICHAEL CRICHTON
Published: March 19, 2006

• The Earth revolves around the Sun.

• The speed of light is a constant.

• Apples fall to earth because of gravity.

• Elevated blood sugar is linked to diabetes.

• Elevated uric acid is linked to gout.

• Elevated homocysteine is linked to heart disease.

• Elevated homocysteine is linked to B-12 deficiency, so doctors should test homocysteine levels to see whether the patient needs vitamins.

ACTUALLY, I can't make that last statement. A corporation has patented that fact, and demands a royalty for its use. Anyone who makes the fact public and encourages doctors to test for the condition and treat it can be sued for royalty fees. Any doctor who reads a patient's test results and even thinks of vitamin deficiency infringes the patent. A federal circuit court held that mere thinking violates the patent.

All this may sound absurd, but it is the heart of a case that will be argued before the Supreme Court on Tuesday. In 1986 researchers filed a patent application for a method of testing the levels of homocysteine, an amino acid, in the blood. They went one step further and asked for a patent on the basic biological relationship between homocysteine and vitamin deficiency. A patent was granted that covered both the test and the scientific fact. Eventually, a company called Metabolite took over the license for the patent.

Although Metabolite does not have a monopoly on test methods — other companies make homocysteine tests, too — they assert licensing rights on the correlation of elevated homocysteine with vitamin deficiency. A company called LabCorp used a different test but published an article mentioning the patented fact. Metabolite sued on a number of grounds, and has won in court so far.

But what the Supreme Court will focus on is the nature of the claimed correlation. On the one hand, courts have repeatedly held that basic bodily processes and "products of nature" are not patentable. That's why no one owns gravity, or the speed of light. But at the same time, courts have granted so-called correlation patents for many years. Powerful forces are arrayed on both sides of the issue.

In addition, there is the rather bizarre question of whether simply thinking about a patented fact infringes the patent. The idea smacks of thought control, to say nothing of unenforceability. It seems like something out of a novel by Philip K. Dick — or Kafka. But it highlights the uncomfortable truth that the Patent Office and the courts have in recent decades ruled themselves into a corner from which they must somehow extricate themselves.

For example, the human genome exists in every one of us, and is therefore our shared heritage and an undoubted fact of nature. Nevertheless 20 percent of the genome is now privately owned. The gene for diabetes is owned, and its owner has something to say about any research you do, and what it will cost you. The entire genome of the hepatitis C virus is owned by a biotech company. Royalty costs now influence the direction of research in basic diseases, and often even the testing for diseases. Such barriers to medical testing and research are not in the public interest. Do you want to be told by your doctor, "Oh, nobody studies your disease any more because the owner of the gene/enzyme/correlation has made it too expensive to do research?"

The question of whether basic truths of nature can be owned ought not to be confused with concerns about how we pay for biotech development, whether we will have drugs in the future, and so on. If you invent a new test, you may patent it and sell it for as much as you can, if that's your goal. Companies can certainly own a test they have invented. But they should not own the disease itself, or the gene that causes the disease, or essential underlying facts about the disease. The distinction is not difficult, even though patent lawyers attempt to blur it. And even if correlation patents have been granted, the overwhelming majority of medical correlations, including those listed above, are not owned. And shouldn't be.

Unfortunately for the public, the Metabolite case is only one example of a much broader patent problem in this country. We grant patents at a level of abstraction that is unwise, and it's gotten us into trouble in the past. Some years back, doctors were allowed to patent surgical procedures and sue other doctors who used their methods without paying a fee. A blizzard of lawsuits followed. This unhealthy circumstance was halted in 1996 by the American Medical Association and Congress, which decided that doctors couldn't sue other doctors for using patented surgical procedures. But the beat goes on.

Companies have patented their method of hiring, and real estate agents have patented the way they sell houses. Lawyers now advise athletes to patent their sports moves, and screenwriters to patent their movie plots. (My screenplay for "Jurassic Park" was cited as a good candidate.)

Where does all this lead? It means that if a real estate agent lists a house for sale, he can be sued because an existing patent for selling houses includes item No. 7, "List the house." It means that Kobe Bryant may serve as an inspiration but not a model, because nobody can imitate him without fines. It means nobody can write a dinosaur story because my patent includes 257 items covering all aspects of behavior, like item No. 13, "Dinosaurs attack humans and other dinosaurs."

Such a situation is idiotic, of course. Yet elements of it already exist. And unless we begin to turn this around, there will be worse to come.

I wanted to end this essay by telling a story about how current rulings hurt us, but the patent for "ending an essay with an anecdote" is owned. So I thought to end with a quotation from a famous person, but that strategy is patented, too. I then decided to end abruptly, but "abrupt ending for dramatic effect" is also patented. Finally, I decided to pay the "end with summary" patent fee, since it was the least expensive.

The Supreme Court should rule against Metabolite, and the Patent Office should begin to reverse its strategy of patenting strategies. Basic truths of nature can't be owned.

Oh, and by the way: I own the patent for "essay or letter criticizing a previous publication." So anyone who criticizes what I have said here had better pay a royalty first, or I'll see you in court.




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22. Haha. Well pointed.
Where will all this lead though? If patents continue like this, then the human race will surely perish from lack of medical care. Essentially, patenting a method of helping humans survive - resulting in (a) death(s) - is a manslaughter and therefore punishable by law! Lol.
2/18/2009 1:34:10 PM

21. That's so awesome that this article resonates on such a level that none seem to recognize that Michael "I died last year" Crichton was the author of this little gem. I'm sure he'd be grinning ear to ear over the comments here if he wasn't rotting in his grave. Cheers Mike!
1/23/2009 12:55:47 AM

20. me too
1/20/2009 10:03:27 PM

19. i agree with the last guy
1/20/2009 10:03:18 PM

18. fuck yea
1/20/2009 10:03:00 PM

17. In response to the previous post: Why not be angry with Metabolite? I do not understand the reasoning here. Why not be angry with BOTH Metabolite and the US Patent Office? If a company is acting in other morally despicable ways (for instance, polluting the environment), should we not blame BOTH the company AND the legal system that permits the company to do what it does?
In any case, this article raises some very important issues that people should know and think about. I personally find it very scary.
1/12/2009 3:32:21 AM

16. You've got it wrong. Don't be angry with Metabolite. If you're going to be angry, be angry with the US Patent Office who granted the patent. I have participated in writing over 30 US and international patents. First, the US patent office will grant you a patent on just about anything without doing anything but the most cursory investigation (they have patented for instance using a laser pointer to distract and exercise a cat ... I'm not lying). Patents are for the most part useless unless you're planning to sell around $30 million dollars a year in product and are prepared to spend the money required to defend your patent not only in the US but around the world (... then they are merely of "questionable" value). Better to protect your ideas through the "trade secret" route (ie. keep it to yourself as long as you can).
1/8/2009 4:16:51 PM

15. It's pretty disgusting that companies and corporations can so easily take over things that should be free and clear for all to study. This is part of the reason the US is so backwards when it comes to medicine and taking care of it's citizens.
1/5/2009 1:18:08 AM

14. i think i might actually write to metabolite. in anger, and explain the fact you cant patent something that needs to be used to help people.
1/1/2009 9:41:25 AM

13. You're right, it's not fair to copyright a law of nature: otherwise, you'd have to fine people for not acting according to the falsehood. Patenting the BOOK is allowed, but a copyright on the Human genome is rather off.
1/1/2009 2:33:39 AM

12. This sucks. Because i say so.
12/31/2008 10:52:05 PM

11. Ha,ha. Love it. Great piece of writing there. I hope you got top marks for this essay.
12/31/2008 4:33:25 AM

10. I have a patent on wondering why people love the system. So number 4, please pay your royalty to me.
12/31/2008 1:05:05 AM

9. Here is a very important essay that everyone should read. It highlights some alarming developments in our society with far reaching implications. YOUR KNOWLEDGE of the dirty facts about corporations and the ways in which they control medicine is the first step in first step in fighting against these disturbing developments. If you feel like doing a good deed today, please forward a link to this page to the people in address book.
- J. Conlan, M.D.
12/30/2008 11:57:29 PM

8. 1 #3
12/30/2008 6:09:57 PM

7. tl;dnr
12/30/2008 10:36:03 AM

6. making love to the system produces satisfying results, that is why
12/29/2008 5:43:41 PM

5. i agree wholeheartedly
1/11/2007 1:19:20 AM

4. www.shorttext.com/juwys

More of the same, in a different vein.
The System sucks - yeah...
Unfortunately many seem to love the System.
Ever wonder why?
7/18/2006 1:43:52 PM

3. Where would you like the cheque sent??
3/29/2006 11:25:16 AM

2. ?
3/23/2006 9:25:33 PM

1. ?
3/23/2006 9:25:28 PM